Week 4 Prep: Bills vs. Patriots

When I took the screenshot on my phone, this score felt significant. The Bills had finally beaten the Patriots, and I was there to watch it happen. I had bought tickets secondhand through an internet friend and convinced Chris it would be a good idea to see what happens when the 2-0 Bills take on New England.

At first it was a great decision; an early afternoon spent with a mini-keg of Newcastle and tailgate food in the parking lot on a bright, sunny day. Then we got inside the stadium and Tom Brady tried to end Aaron Williams’ life. It was awful and looked headed towards a blowout, yet another in a long string of losses to the Patriots. But Brady started throwing interceptions, and the rest is history.

A glimpse at the season as a whole confirms that this game did mean little. Buffalo’s quick start didn’t get them to the playoffs and Brady’s miscues at the Ralph didn’t prevent New England from making the Super Bowl. That September day alone was unique in how it flipped the script on what has become an underwhelming, one-sided rivalry.

It may be a fluke, but the New England Patriots are beatable. I’ve seen it happen before. My phone even told me once.

Essential Info

Kickoff: 1 p.m. on CBS.

Your Announcers: Greg Gumbel, Dan Dierdorf

A-team this week! By the way, Tom Brady is really good at football. They might mention it.

Other Games You Can Watch If You Don’t Have Sunday Ticket, You Millionaire You (via the506.com)

New Orleans at Green Bay, 4 p.m., FOX

No doubleheader on CBS and a home game blackout on FOX means it’s slim pickens in the afternoon. I hope you like Joe Buck.

Depth Charts:
Bills. Patriots.

You know, in case you forgot the name of that punter that’s not Brian Moorman.

Smart People Writing Dumb Things

Chuck Klosterman feels like a bad dude because Chris Johnson sucks now and we mostly know this because fantasy football.

The piece itself is a perfect example of what—with few exceptions—Grantland has become. It’s a site designed with footnotes in mind where thinking writers can tackle high-minded issues with poor editing. Fantasy Football has changed us, just like everything else in the universe impacts, well, everything else.

Thinking about football players based on their statistical value makes us bad people, or something. Fantasy football is kind of a waste of time. Thanks for that, Chuck.

Here’s a Photo of Jim Kelly, Who is Still Not Ryan Fitzpatrick

Get into my life, awful 90s Bills sweatshirt.

Amazingly Complex Patriots Preview

The Patriots are usually really good at football. They haven’t been as good this season, for some reason. Maybe that will continue today.

Motivational Phrase Written in Puppies

Al Pacino did a decent job but guys, Puppies.

YouTube Nostalgia

Game of the Week footage! This was the Bills’ opener in 1973, the year O.J. Simpson broke 2,000 yards in a season. One of three videos. Definitely worth the time.

PICKS PICKS PICKS PICKS

No one gives a shit who I think will win this game. Still.

Some Sunday Afternoon Jams
Sunday Afternoon Jams

Scab Watch

That’s Chan Gailey arguing with a scab. Overall, things weren’t a complete disaster with replacement officiating during Bills games. Some inevitable inconsistencies in pass interference and some missed holding calls, sure, but those are the first things to go when you have sub-par officiating.

Grade: F-

Legitimate Opposing Quarterback Analysis

Tom Brady has a sponsorship agreement with Under Armor, which means he has to avoid displaying Nike logos on his body, if at all possible. He’s a smart guy, so I’m sure he’ll figure something out. If he figured out where to hide that Dodge Dart behind all his BMWs, he can hide a swoosh or two.

By the way, have you ever been to an Under Armor store? That shit is crazy expensive.

Shout, Damnit

Excitable Adventure Time GIF

Where to Find Us
We’ll be on the Twitters all day, so feel free to say hello and swear at us. Don’t forget your SARCASM hashtags.

Famous Last Words

Go Bills.

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