How To Lose Fans And Alienate People

By Chris

Tim Tebow is in town. Stop the presses. He reportedly had dinner with Jim Kelly last night and that makes me happy that Jimbo doesn’t make personnel decisions for the Bills on draft day.

Buffalo Rumblings has done a nice job keeping tabs on the Tebow situation, including this little link that I had missed the first time around. From Peter King’s Twitter:

Not to set off any alarm bells in Buffalo or anything, but Buddy Nix really likes Tim Tebow.

Alarms are sounding off all over Western New York. Or at least here in the Roost.

Buddy Nix, unlike Kelly, has a say in who the Bills select. In fact, he’s got the most say aside from old Ralph Wilson. So I hope King means that Nix likes Tebow as a person. Because there’s no way he can like the way he plays quarterback.

Someone please assure me that there’s no way they use the No. 9 pick on Tebow.

We have to hope they don’t move down in the first round or up from the second round to pick him and we have to hope someone has already taken him before they make their second pick. Because apparently everyone thinks some general manager will be dumb enough to select Tebow in the top 50.

Is it so hard to pick a quarterback who actually has experience playing quarterback?

Actually, someone just assure me that there’s no way the Bills draft Tim Tebow at all. The franchise has so many holes that to waste a draft pick on a project like Tebow would be the absolute dumbest thing they could do. It would set the franchise back and the Bills would continue to be a punchline throughout the league.

But then again, is it bad that, deep down, I want the Bills to draft Tim Tebow for the same reason I like watching stuff like this on TV?

It would be a train wreck, but it would be a fun train wreck, right? It would give us a reason to heckle and ridicule the Bills even more. We’d actually have a reason to write about them again. Tebow would be the talk of the town, if only because everyone would be talking about how he throws a football like a 14-year-old girl.

Tebow would actually be the best Bills fullback since Larry Centers. Wah wah wah, Tim Tebow’s intangibles. If the Donovan McNabb trade isn’t happening, draft someone that’s played quarterback.

Our relationship with the Bills is strained as it is. Please don’t make us legitimately hate the product on the field by drafting Tebow. Just don’t.


  1. I think that the move might not have the backlash that you might think because a majority of Bills fans still think that Tebow is a good quarterback.

  2. We Bills fans think we know everything. We think we could run the team better than the management. Maybe that was true most recently, but at least for a year or two I’m willing to trust the selection of Buddy Nix and Chan Gailey. One of the reasons I’m wiling to trust them is that if the fans had our way, we’d have Bill Cowher and Mike Holmgren running the team. Do we know they were best for Buffalo? They’ve done well in the past but how many big names can replicate their success in a second or third venue? On the other hand, Marv Levy was less successful as a NFL coach than Gailey, before he came here. Who knew anything about Bill Polian before he came here? And Jim Kelly was not a high draft pick. Big names are at least as likely to be busts than unknowns. So I’m willing to trust Nix and Gailey that their silence and minimal activity above the radar indicates they know exactly what they’re doing and it involves acquiring gems in the rough that they have special knowledge re how to polish.

    Kelly likes Tebow because he thinks Tebow could be the next Kelly. Kelly may be the next owner. Whether or not he is, we should certainly trust his insight and if he likes Tebow, I’m willing to give Kelly the benefit of the doubt over the fickle fan whose NFL experience is limited to operating a remote.

  3. I see your point. I just want a quarterback who can actually play the position, whether the Bills draft him in the first round or the fourth. You won’t see us campaigning with billboards here or any of that nonsense, there’s just nothing I’ve seen from Tebow that says he’ll be a good NFL quarterback.

  4. *shrug* i like tim tebow.

  5. donbrandt

    Drafting Tebow would set the franchise back? How exactly is that possible. It really can’t get any worse. At least they could say that they tried and went out and got someone people have actually heard of. Not some beach bum who went to Tulane or a QB who won 9 games in 3 years at Stanford.

  6. Unless the change the offense to a spread attack. It doesn’t make sense. I’d rather go with Colt McCoy. Who won all the QB awards in college.

    And also a hell of a guy himself.

  7. This needs to happen so I don’t have to give a shit about this team at all.

    “I’m willing to trust the selection of Buddy Nix and Chan Gailey. One of the reasons I’m wiling to trust them is that if the fans had our way, we’d have Bill Cowher and Mike Holmgren running the team.”

    I love this. I’ll blindly trust them but I won’t blindly trust these other guys who were more successful. It’s the perfect mindset that Bills organization wants their fans to have. Keep fucking that chicken.

    “And Jim Kelly was not a high draft pick. ”

    Pretty sure he was drafted in the first half of the first round. The highest the Bills have ever drafted a QB as an NFL team and higher than 19 of the 32 starting QBs in the NFL this year.

    “Kelly likes Tebow because he thinks Tebow could be the next Kelly. Kelly may be the next owner.”

    No, Kelly likes Tebow because he’s a Jesusback. Tebow is the polar opposite of Jim Kelly as a football player. And Kelly will never be the next owner. He might be a figurehead but he’ll never be an NFL owner. When the Bills sell they’re going to go for $900m+. They could easily fetch a billion dollars if the Jags and Vikes and the like have already been moved/sold and a bidding war erupts. A guy who played before QBs made $15m a year and lost millions through bad business decisions does not have that kind of money around.

    “At least they could say that they tried and went out and got someone people have actually heard of.”

    Yes, please. Let’s draft by name recognition and not skills. That’s the best way to fix this clusterfuck.

  8. NoUseForANickname

    You guys never see the silver lining. Just start thinking about all the material that the Roost would gain from this…many great posts about how bad the Bills are, the QB situation and whathaveyou (See last few years). Perhaps even a new photoshop of a QB being run over by something. Good times.

    Secondly, the list on The Shirt will have another entry and the Browns will have to step it up, else the Bills begin to challenge for being the best at something.

  9. Mark

    Can someone explain to me where all the Tebow hate comes from? What indication do we have that he won’t be successful as a quarterback in the NFL? Tebow has won at EVERY level of football he’s ever played. Not only has he won, but he’s been outstanding at every level of football. The escalation from NCAA to NFL is not as great as people believe. The league consists of former college players – players that Tebow has already proven he can compete against.

    I’m not saying he’s the answer in Buffalo, but you just make yourself look ignorant when you say he’d be a train wreck. From most accounts, he has an unparalleled work ethic and a fairly high aptitude for the game. That’s WAY better than anything Buffalo has had in a very long time.