Give the People What They Want

by Ryan

For reasons that I will never understand, our site often comes up when people do Google searches for Halloween costumes. Perhaps it is our unique sense of what is hip and now, or maybe because we have about 3,000 tags, all of which involve geese of some sort.

In any event, we’ve decided to embrace this new market for the month and offer Roost-approved Halloween costumes. We won’t offer you anything slutty to wear because we aren’t girls, (although word on the street is that Jon is a huuuuge skank) but at least you’ll have something cool to wear that won’t get arrested.

Our first selection may seem odd, or maybe just too obvious.

Now hear us out on this. It’s very likely you have already worn this before, but when was the last time you saw anyone over the age of five in a pumpkin costume? It’s the perfect costume, really. There’s almost zero chance anyone else will have it, and if they do, they read us and you should be best friends/marry them if you’re into that kinda thing.

Anyway, go with the pumpkin. You’ll have a good story behind it, and probably look damn adorable in it. It’s the perfect match to the inappropriately dressed nurse/witch/bunny/Amy Winehouse/mummy of your dreams.