I Figured it Out

by Ryan

So the big news out of Bills camp yesterday is that Jason Peters hasn’t showed up yet.

After reading over that amazing blend of redundancy and inaction it hit me: I know what the Bills are up to.

This whole stalemate, there has to be a reason behind it, right? I mean, it can’t just be a fundamental Catch-22 that neither side is willing to break for the sake of pride and negotiation ground. We’re not that stupid, right? There just has to be a reason for it.

Michael Oher.

I know that seems crazy, but hang on just one second and we can talk this out.

So start the rationalization with the fact that Russ Brandon reads The Goose’s Roost daily. This would mean he saw us talk about The Blind Side earlier in the summer. Of course this peaked his interest in the books’ featured player, and he started doing some research on him.

Then the Jason Peters thing came up. He stated he would hold out and the Bills demanded he come to camp before any deals are discussed. Of course he declined, and the Bills were put into a pickle. That’s where Oher comes in.

If the Bills stay strong, and Peters doesn’t mind sitting around all winter, well, this holdout will go on the entire year. And what happens if the Bills go the entire year without a Pro Bowl lineman to protect their developing second year quarterback’s blind side?

Well, they tank, that’s what they do. And what does a bad team get? A high draft pick.

Once again, enter Michael Oher. He is the top left tackle in the upcoming draft, and would certainly be drafted in the top ten. The Bills finish 2-14 and Oher starts next September. And that’s the rest of the story.

Now, I know you may think there are at least a dozen holes in that scenario, and well, you’re right. However, it must be true because that’s all I can come up with, and I’ve had three months to think it over. If anyone has any other ideas I’m willing to listen, but I think we may as well just accept the fact that Michael Oher will be a Bill within twelve months.

Go Rebels?