A Thought on War, Gutenberg, and SUVs

by Ryan

There is nothing like a 16 hour car ride to make you want to stab someone in the face. When you are trapped in a motor vehicle for that long, your weaponry is limited, so you are probably going to act out while taking a break. This type of incident usually happens at a Denny’s or Bob Evans or some sort, and most often within the borders of West Virgina. (A fact I will not look up but promise is true. We have stories.)

In any event, I made it back to the homestead in one piece and, amazingly, with some treasures. Vacation souvenirs are simultaneously the best and worst part of a trip. On one hand, they are the tangible fruits of your endeavor, the material belongings that will remind you of your time well spent. On the other hand, they are the useless, overpriced crap you can’t fit in the car and immediately regret buying.

Things I resisted buying while on vacation:
A rubber chicken
A cowboy hat
A Frozen Rockuccino™ from the KISS Coffeehouse

Anything NASCAR related
Sand

Things I bought while on vacation:
Sonic (didn’t need to be packed)
Obligatory t-shirt
This:

No, that isn’t a newspaper. Not really, at least. I found this at a sports card store near our residence for the week. I had been eying it all week, and came away with this and a huge Upper Deck ad with David Ortiz on it. Hey, I need to cover some wall space.

This is where my journalistic nerdiness helped me in my purchase, but failed me in my justification for it. This is a metal… thing for a newspaper printed by the Washington Post on January 21st, 1991. For those of you that don’t recall the exact date of big moments in Buffalo Sports history, let’s try that headline again, shall we?

Yeah, that’s the day after the 51-3 AFC Championship Game against the Raiders. That was an interesting day for the country, and the next picture sums it up nicely.

The main reason I bought it was not because it held such warm memories, but rather because it was a ridiculously interesting timepiece. This was a snapshot of what it was like with your team on the brink of a championship. The newspaper gives the line “Bills by 5”, and says that the Bills are the first real threat to the NFC in years. No matter what happened in the game, it’s interesting to know what “the papers” were saying about your team almost two decades ago. Combine that with the Gulf War angle and it was more than worth the eight bucks for it, even if I have no idea what to do with it.

Hey, remember Todd Marinovich? Good times!

Speaking of cocaine, what the hell is going on in this picture? LT is mauling his own kicker, and another linebacker is literally doing cartwheels. If I didn’t know what happened the next week, I would have guessed that group of knuckleheads had no chance of beating the Bills. Ah, to be frozen in time…

One Comment

  1. Justice4Claire

    My brother who lives in Colorado said to me in a moment of clarity after 51-3, ” What if the Bills lose ?” We both burst out into derisive laughter a la Wayne’s World “as if..” but I think it took until about June for one of to admit that conversation. I would surely have grabbed up this paper for the same reasons. AT the time I was yearbook advisor at a high school where I taught and I recall with some sick feeling having to clip those losing headlines and paste them onto the sheets for posterity’s sake.