Lindy: Paul, can I talk to you for a moment?
Paul: Yeah coach?
Lindy: You asked about the captaincy?
Paul: Yeah coach. I’ve been working really hard all season trying to get us in the playoffs. I know I haven’t been on the scoresheet a lot but I’ve been working on my faceoffs, trying to be better in front and really sticking up for the guys when there’s trouble. I know I’m young, but I thought maybe I could get a shot at a letter one of these months…
Lindy: Okay, but we need to talk about your flair.
Lindy: You see, you have on 15 pieces of flair. Look, we want you to express yourself, ok? If you think the bare minimum is enough, then ok. But some people choose to wear more and we encourage that, ok? You do want to express yourself, don’t you?
Paul: Yeah, yeah coach.
Lindy: Okay, so maybe next time you’re out there try being a bit less… aggressive. It’s about being consistent, well liked, and mostly being adorable. And wearing cute buttons. Oh, and take off the one that says “Mike Grier was right.”
Lindy: Now, it’s up to you whether or not you want to just do the bare minimum. Well, like Jason, for example, has 37 pieces of flair. And a terrific smile.
Lindy: You do want to express yourself, don’t you?
Paul: Yeah. Yeah. Here, coach.
Lindy: Great. Great. That’s all I ask.