Maddenoliday

By, Jon

Before I begin writing, I must warn our loyal readers that the statement I am going to attempt to prove may come as a shock to some, and may appall others. I didn’t run this idea by my fellow writers, but frankly, I don’t care. I guess this is a bit of a disclaimer: The following statement represents the feelings of the author and the author only, and may not be shared with fellow Roosters.

That being said…………..

Any person who waits outside of a store at midnight to pick up the newest edition of Madden needs to find a hobby. Seriously.

Did you look around you? I’m sure you felt great about your position in life while you where standing there in your Chad Johnson jersey (Ocho Cinco sure can catch a bomb on Madden) at a video game store that is usually overrun with 12-year-olds sporting thick-rimmed glasses being escorted by ma or pa.

Stores everywhere are sold out by now, without a doubt. Copies will probably pop up on E-bay for well over face value. All to buy basically the same game as last year, just with updated team and player rankings. Wow! What a steal! In fact, I would go as far as saying the game hasn’t changed since 2003. Sure there may be new mini-games or whatever other scams they put in there to keep people buying the new versions, and with the new systems being internet capable, you could probably get some sort of patch to update the players and rankings anyways (I am in no way a video game nut, so that could be totally false.) Anyone who wishes to argue with me that this is worth 60 bones and an all-nighter every year will lose. Guaranteed. I will fight that battle to the grave. Try me.

Also, Madden strategy does not equal NFL strategy. The next time someone tries to talk football with me and references a play or anything from Madden, I might drop-kick them. I can’t even tell you how many times this has happened to me. You can know everything there is to know about Madden and not know a damn thing about real football.

I’m not saying that every Madden player is like this. I, myself, am I proud owner of Madden 2005 and 2007 (purchased 15 dollars each in 2005 and 2007, respectively). A good amount of my friends play religiously, and can put me to shame with football knowledge (especially fantasy football.) But after witnessing the beginnings of a Madden tournament on a simple trip to my local video store, I’m convinced that the majority of Madden players are simply video game nerds.

But then again, I spend my free time writing for a pointless blog read by a dozen or so people. Who’s worse off? You be the judge….

One Comment

  1. Rickey Henderson

    I resent the term “videogame nerd.” Please use “videogame pervert” instead.

    And yes, Madden is an awful franchise. Judging by the few times Rickey has played it, all it takes to win is to toss long bombs down the sideslines at wide receivers with a rating of 80+.