The Bottomline

By Ryan

We will return to The Goose’s Roost after this brief PSA from sports fans everywhere:

Dear ESPN Bottomline Guy,

We understand you have a lot on your mind, but sometimes you suck for us. We know it is your job to tell us everything that happened in a limited amount of space, but sometimes you just get in the way. For example, if we are blessed with a replay of a major sporting event, please be so kind as to omit the final score of that game from your programing. Thanks a bunch, kiddo.

Listen, we have no problem with a final score incident on SportsCenter, otherwise you would have nothing to run for an hour. However, when you are intentionally replaying the NCAA Lacrosse Championships and know exactly when it is played, do you really have to run the final score and give in depth analysis while it is in the first quarter? Really? In this modern world of cell phone updates and lightening fast technology, there is no way you can skip over the one score anyone watching your programing doesn’t want to see?

Why not place a nice ad for your website, or even your highlight show running on your sister station? If someone wanted to get the final, there are tons of better options than the deuce. Heck, the least you could have done is posted a final score and a “GO WATCH THE STANLEY CUP FINALS!!!” banner on the picture. If you are not going to care, at least make some money off Versus advertising.

So in conclusion, thank you ESPN, for killing millions of Duke Lacrosse jokes for the people who have better things to do on Memorial Day than watch midday NCAA lacrosse. We were biting tonight, we were biting… tonight.

We would also like to thank the good people at MSG for showing the final and entire summary of Game 5 of the Sabres/Rangers series while showing “Rangers in 60,” thereby ruining one of the most important moments in Buffalo sports history for people whose Tivo taped the Versus blackout. Good call, boys…

Sincerely,

Everyone